8.30.2012

Cha cha cha changes...

farm
Now that I've gone back to teaching and the babes are both in school,  I feel like I've entered some sort of pseudo-mourning period. Maybe using the word mourning isn't exactly right- this is a huge personal transition and I'm generally feeling really positive about it. It's been great to be around students again and to talk to other adults and to dress up in clothing that isn't stretchy. It's also been great for EZ E and Kicky to experience new people and new ideas. We've been home together for the past 4 years and this change is necessary. I can't keep them at home forever, nor do I want to- my job is to make them happy, responsible, successful adults. That's how it should work, right? I think so. That said, this transition is a little scary for all of us and I'm feeling nostalgic. I've found myself asking "do you remember..." a lot lately. These photos are from our fossil hunt last Fall. Do you remember that? If I'm mourning anything, it's not being able to be as spontaneous with my two favorite people. I'm curious to hear your thoughts on transitional moments in your own life. How did you (or would you) handle it?

farm

14 comments:

Anna said...

i am melting at the cuteness of those boot pictures! i'm not a mom yet, and i miss my dog while i'm at work so i am 100 percent not able to give you any helpful insight.

Nancy said...

Wow...that's a pretty powerful transitional time for a woman and family. I have not yet gone through this myself, but I'm sending good thoughts your way and feeling you!

Meghan Splawn said...

sigh. long long deep sigh. Our little one is 7 months now and I still feel like I am mourning my time with her. I don't feel deeply depressed, but I notice my job is not nearly as satisfactory as being at home with her.

I struggle daily with wanting to just be home with her but recognizing how important it is to keep my career so I can provide other things for her long term. And I don't just mean financially because I think showing her you can have both a happy family and a career is possible.

I know I won't always feel this way, but this year has felt like one giant transition! Feel free to send some coping tips my way.

jwo said...

eI think you have to try your hardest at believing the change is good. I get it and I don't have kids either....but I teach:). Life brings these changes about in so many ways and for me believing in them is the hardest part and cherish the memories. Fall is so nostalgic! Your kids are adorable!

Molly said...

you should have another child- your two are so adorable!

Naturally Carol said...

Life is definitely more structured when you're working and trying to fit in other things with the kids after school and at weekends...in some ways more stressful too I would think.

kristin said...

Oh girl, good luck with this transition. It's a big one. I've been having trouble for weeks getting ready for my little gal to go to school for the first time. ARGH! Take care.

Jen Craun said...

I'm baking my way through it. I'm on hyper-drive stocking up their after school childhood memory bank. It's coping, and helping me to connect to my childhood memories of my mom during this same season. With both babes in school all day, right now I have a teaching day and 4 studio days. I haven't had this much time to print since grad school. It's a lot more emotional than I could have prepared for. I totally hear you in this post.

Aesthetic Outburst... said...

Awwww- thank you all SO much. I'm happy to report that we made it through our first week relatively unscathed. Next week is going to be the real test with EZ E headed off to kindergarten. I'm a bundle of nerves. My parents ALWAYS worked outside the home and were (and continue to be) fabulous parents. I know that it's possible and I know it'll work out.

With regard to the baby thing, I think Kicky being our last baby sort of adds to the 'mourning'. However, not having anymore children was a conscious, mutual decision- one that we didn't make quickly or lightly. Luckily both of my brothers are engaged, so I'm planning to live vicariously when they have adorable babies someday. :)

Thanks again, everyone! XOXO

Erika D. said...

Glad to hear your week ended well :)
It's hard, I just went back to work full time, and I am missing dropping off my girl at school, picking her up from school and having our own little girl time before heading home. She is now in an after school program, but you are right about our fabulous parents, they did it and so will we :)

sidenote: I'm feeling a little sad about our little baby turning 2 this month, we also decided 2 was our magic kid number and I am waiting for friends to have babies!!

Have a good weekend!

Jen said...

Abbey - I know this might sound terrible, but I am envious of your situation (not the feeling nostalgic part per se, but the sending the kids to school and getting back to work). I LOVE my kids more than anything in this world but I have put my teaching and my career in the studio on hold for the last 5 years and it has really been hard for me. I feel too exhausted most days to work, yet I have the ideas and the drive but by the time I get to them they are gone or not as interesting anymore. I miss teaching SO much. I felt inspired by most of my students. The give and take of ideas and being around people who were so fresh and full of energy really fueled my passion for art. As opposed to my kids, who because of their ages, just drain that energy from me. I guess the grass is always greener...Enjoy what we have, whatever it may be. Life moves so quickly, I have to keep reminding myself.

chiara said...

I loved this post and loved reading all the comments. I'm also feeling this way - my younger will be in school 3 days this year and although I so long for my own time it's just hard either way. I used to get anxious going back to school and thought those days were over! Now I am anxious for THEM going back to school!

JoyLuck said...

I've never commented before but I've been reading your blog for a while now, follow you on Pinterest, etc., so I hope you don't mind my throwing in my two cents. I just wanted to say that you, more than most, are actually doing a really great job of holding onto and appreciating what you have and have had with you're little ones. Maybe it is because of your blog but I know that it is blogs like yours that have really made me stop myself in the last year and say to myself, "What do I have?" There are always things I want, that I think would make me/us happier, and it is fine to dream and have goals, but you don't want to wish away what you've got right now being so focused on what you don't have, if that makes sense. It seems to me that you already do a wonderful job of appreciating the little things and making the most of it all. And, because you have the foresight to even write a post like this while going through such a big transition says that when you do suddenly find yourself with moments to spare, a spring break or what-have-you, you will absolutely without a doubt be right on top of appreciating that you have it and recreating the time before school and work made for stricter schedules. Anyway, not sure that has made sense but I think you are blessed to already recognize that that time you had was precious. Some people don't realize it until years after the fact when it is much too late to recreate any of what was once there.

Aesthetic Outburst... said...

Thank you so much! I'm always touched by what an incredibly thoughtful group of people read this little blog. I am very, very lucky.
xo,
Abbey

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